Wednesday, November 30, 2016

Wading and Waiting


I'm wading in the holiday season. I'm trying to lose myself a bit in the bright lights and sparkle that are beginning to be thrown up around the city. I cling to the shiny visuals like tangible hope.

I eat another cookie. I find comfort in my stomach and in my hands.




I'm waiting for this year to end.

It's a time of transition. It's a busy time at work. There have been a lot of germs in my household. There have been a lot of headaches. But really it's really not too much to whine about. It's the grind.

I sleep either awkwardly or out of sheer exhaustion.

I think my mood is something that of an angst filled teen, impatient but overwhelmed with a case of the feels. If anything, this has allowed me to at least relate to The Kid a little easier as he goes through his own set of "things in this life."

That tiny person taking photos at the intersection is my angst filled teen. I saw him while I was eating lunch across the way.
There is a lot to sift through at the moment. What makes sense? At what point to do you move on and say, I am beginning to waste too much energy on trying to figure out something that I can't really control. I guess that sifting is figuring out what you can control.

I feel like there is some kind of knitting analogy buried in there, but I haven't got it.

And so my friends, we trod on. Wish good wishes for all in our hearts.

Knitting pics soon. :)

16 comments:

  1. I was just wondering how you were doing yesterday! It is a hard time to find hope, isn't it? At least you live in a blue state. Things here are so red. Very hard to live with.
    Your cookies look so good. If I bake now, I'll eat it all myself!

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  2. I know what it's like to be buried in The Feels. All you can do is stop. Take a deep breath, and focus on the things you can control. Makes lists if that helps.... it helps you look at smaller things instead of the overall and you don't feel so overwhelmed

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  3. Virtual hugs to you. If it helps, those candy cane striped hersheys kisses give me a reason for living.

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  4. I've been eating my way out of the feels also but nothing as delicious as what you have made. I wish you lived nearby. I'd be dropping by for coffee everyday.

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  5. The title of this post perfectly describes my everyday angst too. I think that's why my blogging has suffered a bit lately. Although keeping my hands busy with knitting and writing down my thoughts in my journal has helped to sift through all the white noise. Finding inspiration in the creativity of others has also lifted the spirits. I love seeing your cozy baking pictures. Hugs to you!

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  6. It sounds like you are finding the courage to accept things that cannot be changed yet discerning what can be changed. It is a long process and seems you are getting it spot on.

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  7. Life is always viewed like waves-we are up and don't notice that others are down...
    It will all sort itself out, just wait and see.

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  8. Good to hear from you again. You've been on my mind, as I've started knitting with the Zombie BBQ sock yarn you gave me.

    Sorry to hear of your struggles. Life is sometimes a slog through murky waters, but just keep wading and reaching out for a steadying hand when you need it.

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  9. Ooooo....the cookies and cake look very tasty.

    I know what you mean about waiting and wondering. I know we can't do anything to change the results of the election, but this wondering and waiting is absolutely painful. I think I'll take a cue from you and try to get lost in the "lights".

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  10. I hear you. I think a lot of us are feeling unsettled and uncertain. I have decided I'm going to do my best to enjoy December, since it's usually a month I love.

    I have been enjoying your baking pics on Instagram, though they always make me hungry!

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  11. Big big hugs. Good to see a post in blogland and always great to see COOKIES> Eat some for me.
    You are listening with your heart to somethings that are unsettling. Look to each other to comfort and carry bravely on

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  12. Onwards. Only way. A lot of comfort eating here too. In fact as I type I'm eating a chocolate covered Anzac bar. I do rather like the look of your cookies. Very fancy. Sending you a cyber hug. CJ xx

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  13. I want to be your official taste tester every time you bake! I'm sorry there's lot of health and angst going on in your house. We've had health stuff here. I'm so immersed in girly stuff that I forget a boy can have things to go through also. I hope he isn't too stressed out nor you.

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  14. i think i added 2" to my hips just looking that that photo!!!! yummmy

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  15. The only way to go is forwards, as hard as it seems to do sometimes. I am having difficulty finding hope, I try to stay away from the news but burying my head in the sand does not work. Every day seems to bring worse possibilities, knitting and playing with yarn helps. SOmetimes a good book, a walk and know that your boy and you will get through this. Mine are 19 and 23 and just the nicest of young men, but the teen years were full of testosterone!

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  16. I hope you find what you are searching for and I hope that whatever is on your mind you are given peace and certainty!

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