Family Quotes & Scenarios

"Be good to your mother. You know what she is right?"
"Your sister."
"That's right. So you mess with my sister, you mess with me."

(On disciplining my nephew who loves to push his Mom's buttons. No-one else's like that, just hers. It's a special relationship it is.)

Teaching Independence ...

I bribed my child to stand on the sidewalk outside of Bi-Rite while I did some quick grocery shopping with Creamery twisted soft serve purchased across the street. It was a nice day in the Mission ... I threw in for crushed Newman O's on the top. It went well, we were a team. The kid ate a treat and self-edited. He stopped himself on his own at a very reasonable amount of ice cream. He only had a minor chocolate moustache instead of the full-on beard. I shopped quickly and did not earn any whinging about taking FOR-EH-VERRR.

(first step to independence is personal responsibility -- oo that sounds smart)

Well ice cream makes you thirsty. We weren't smart enough to bring a water bottle to the park that day. I agreed to buy him a small bottle of water. I agreed to buy him a mineral water.

I put my foot down when it comes time to open up. "No, I will not open your water."

"I'm not very good at opening them. These are really hard for me Mom."

"I understand that, however, you have to try."

I pause here for dramatic purposes. I'm really good at dramatic purposes or at least drama.

"Okay let's pretend." I hear that imagination is a helpful tool in parenting and relating to your child ...

"Let's pretend we are in the desert. And ... I'm dead. This is your bottle of water."

He tried. Dear, sweet boy tried. Regardless of my ghost-like existence in this scenario I tried to help him with technique. Stabilize with one hand, twist with the other. Hmm, maybe try twisting in the other direction? Those skinny Minnie arms struggled.

"Well that was a good try. I'm glad you tried a few different things. You almost had it."

When I opened it, it was really lose, the plastic just needed to come off.

"You should've tried a little more." I'm sorry. I couldn't help myself. I hand him the water and he says, thank you and we start walking down the street again.

"Well, I guess we are both dead in the desert." And be both started laughing.