Grumpy Cow ...

Says moooove outta my way -- imma grumpy.

No pictures uploaded, laundry still overflowing, knitting at a standstill, birthday coming.

I really have no right to be such a dirthead. I was all anxiety ridden about getting the kid across town to Science Camp this week. First day out the gate, All the MUNI gods aligned and we made uncrowded trains and transferred to bus with ease. I was able to quickly catch the 35 AND the F back to work. I was on time. Why can't I ride that high?

I have been trying to get a handle on why I am such a reversible spazz right now as I said to The New Girl. (spazzy on the inside, and visibly spazzy on the outside). I think it's the birthday thing. I have been pretty normal about it most years, but for some reason, it's affecting me.

so i assume, i'm working some shit out up there in my lalaland. i imagine a cartoony (thinner me) with lots of scratch paper inside my brain, looking an little chaotic at a desk.

TNG says, I'm young at heart and to just enjoy myself. I need to keep her around, like these new sparkly designs. hehe.

Well whatever this is, I need to shake it off before I become a serious buzz kill. In the olden days I'd just lock myself up in my room and sort of detox it out. However being a grown up doesn't allow you that privelage anymore. Now I have to still be around people, you know, like the one I pledged my undying love to, and the other one that I'm supposedly, raising, rearing, guiding and f*cking up all at once.

I really should write a parenting book. Best selling like Sarah Palin eh?

Anyways, working you know ... out in the world of the office, there are other people. Yeah I know! Crazy talk right?!? So here's the thing. You have to try and be normal for them too. Yes, yes, I know they should be tolerant. But really no one needs my b.s. and I don't need theirs. Works both ways you know what I mean.

I'm not full on tourettes or anything right now, but I need to count to 6 and take a deep (non visible) breath before engaging in work conversation.

I need to stop being a grumpy cow.